Thoughts...

I still have them. These days they are just finding their outlet in other mediums. I'm still not ready to give up on this blogging thing - but I do need to determine what sort content I'd like see posted here anymore.

Any any case, expect something here soon. Really.

thoughts on time and space...

Check out this video I've been working on (this has been taking up a lot of time outside of my studies, hence the dearth of blog posts).

http://tinyurl.com/ytts22

Loving Embrace

Laura and I are project people. We are do-it-yourselfers.

We sit around and daydream about all the things we could be doing

with our house.

With our sidewalk.

With our back patio.

With our basement.

With the community garden.

And then?

Then, we sit on those ideas. For a while.

This weekend, our Lord embraced our (growing) family with His family. We had quite a few projects that needed completion before little man Twilley comes out of the womb, but we didn't have a ton of time with which to do it. So our friends (using just first names, if you are a friend - and you are reading this - let me know if you'd like your name to link somewhere such as another blog or web page or if you want me to include your last name) Dusty, Haley and Jason, Jason, Joanna and Zac, Justin, and Karen came along to help us paint, put up bookshelves, and add some nice touches to the basement.

Libations, snacks and dinner were provided, but those are a measly thanks for the amount of work that went into this past Saturday.

So... those people (or you, if you are one of those people and are currently reading this) are the physical manifestation of Christ in this world to us. It consistently amazes me that the link that we have to so many people in this city comes under the umbrella of a relationship with Jesus and that the same relationship would, in all likelihood, not exist apart from that umbrella.

Most of the people listed live in West Philadelphia (University City) - how would we have met them apart from meeting Jesus first? We have no business in U City except to worship on Sundays.

Jason met his wife Haley through a church here. I met Jason through his sister at my University. We (his sister and I) met because we were involved in a ministry together.

I have been accused, on many occasions, for over-spiritualizing things. However, I think I tend to over-think things more often than I over-spiritualize them. Part of the territory of believing in a God thats sovereign is believing that nothing exists without purpose (regardless of whether I know what the purpose of whatever exists is) so it's often hard for me to imagine a world where everything doesn't have a spiritual aspect to it (even while I still don't always behave as if I believe that).

We are thankful to our friends.

We are thankful for our friends.

There is a lot that happens in our neighborhood, our city, our country and our world that can have the tendency to overshadow the reality of Christ moving to remind us, who are undeserving, of his abundant mercies. There is a lot that I could dwell on (and that I do dwell on) in regard to poverty, oppression and the sin(s) that so easily entangle.

But Saturday was still a reminder that He is the God who lives.

That He cares.

That He loves His people.

That He loves us through His people.

Surreal Self Understanding

Have you ever seen the Dali (tried to do an accented 'i', sorry) painting, "The Persistance of Memory?" You probably have, but you might not know what it was - it's the one with the melting clocks (google it; you'll find it).

Sometimes, I kind of feel like that's my world, in a sense. Sometimes I wonder if the things that I perceive as normal are completely off by other people's standards.

Look, I'm not just talking about a difference of opinion.

A lot of these thoughts started off with my working through, and ultimately completing two semesters worth of Hebrew this summer. See, I used to think that I got languages. I went through four years of Spanish (well... at least four semesters - two in highschool, two in college) and performed relatively well without trying. I spent eight weeks in Belo Horizonte, Brasil and caught on to the language well enough to have (limited) conversations with people and to understand a bit of what they were saying to me.

I took Hebrew, and I was dashed to pieces.

To some of the folks that I've talked to, I've said that I have not depended on the Lord (intellectually) more than I have during the past two months. My weaknesses were made evident.

But I was thinking... even before this... that maybe I'm not nearly as intelligent as I once thought I was. There's a long history with this (coupled with a sense of destiny in regard to how I view my life - maybe another point for another time) that isn't too worth getting into now.

In one of my philosophy classes in college, I remember talking about color. I remember the discussion led into the fact that color comes at us in different frequencies of light - that wasn't worth debating. What we talked about (at that time... for that class period anyways) was how we know we're both seeing blue. What if my blues are reds and your blues are greens, but another person's blues are really blue? So... that's more of an existentialist type of thing, right? Because the definition of a thing is dependent on the person who defines it.

But what about a more metaphysical aspect. What if I see myself as something, but you and everyone else see me as something completely different. This is meant as no slander, but as an example - does a person with Down's Syndrome realize the effect of Down's? More to the point, is there an internal voice that says "I am different that what might be expected as "normal?"

Please hear me, I am not looking for affirmation from this. It's just something I've been thinking about for a little while.

All to say, I no longer believe that I am as intelligent as I once thought I was. That's kind of a drag. Ancient Hebrew helped me to see that. But existence kind of still begs a definition, right?

Who am I?

How am I wired?

What am I supposed to do?

How am I supposed to do that?

Why should I do anything?

What does "supposed to" mean in the prior statements?

(on a side note, feel free to correct my philosophical connotations of metaphysics and existentialism).

Open Call for Links

Hi friends, I posted this on facebook last night - but if you're in the business of sharing links, let me know and we can exchange (i.e. - I link to your blog, you link to mine).

Let me know!

-GT

MySpace

I've posted a few pictures from the past winter. We received more snow that what we (or most Philadelphians) are accustomed to over the course of three or four snow storms.

The snow lasted for days.

There were streets that were never plowed (ours, for example).

People... started to go crazy.

And by crazy, I really mean that most people were living according to how they exist. That is people were afraid, so they protected what they had. People were selfish, so they hoarded what they had. People were greedy, so they took more than their portion.

When I say people here, I am not intending a universal sense of the word but one in which there was a large consensus of many who declared, "this is mine," in one way or another.

What I mean by all of this is that (for those who own vehicles) parking was hard. Some people resorted to "marking" their space by leaving various things to say, "this is mine!" I even heard of a story where an older "gentleman," began arguing with a young lady (not my wife) because she was trying to take a spot that had been marked off in front of his house by means of a bucket in the street.

She was pregnant.

For now, I am leaving out my interpretation of my own judgement of what people were doing. The pictures I'm posting are garish; they were taken at night and I tried to squeeze in between cars on the other side of these respective streets to get a face forward view of what I was seeing. The light from the flash is harsh. Up to this point, none of these are edited (I will do cropping etc later). I think it just provides a stark reminder of how folks can be in this city.

As a post script, it didn't help that the mayor encouraged this behavior. It's mentioned on a story you can read by clicking here; it's about a woman who had her tires slashed for moving a trash can.

You can check out more of the MySpace pictures by clicking here (or the link on the title of this post)

New Template

Hi Everyone,

So I've been completely out (of the game) for quite some time now.

Short list of what's happened (if you don't know this, maybe we haven't talked in a while).

I quit working at Allstate.

I started back to school full time.

We found out we're having a little boy (due December).

I complete two semesters worth of Ancient Hebrew.

I hope to read a bit over the next couple of weeks. In addition, I have a goal of riding my bike 200 miles over the next thirty days.

So...is anyone reading this anymore?

Look and Listen

Here are some things I've read and listened to lately. You can check out my reviews on Amazon, but I'll say a short bit here about them.

Music

I'll start here because there's only one thing I've reviewed lately

(I'm listening to something else that I will definitely be reviewing soon also).

Freelance Whales is my new favorite band. I take them as a kind of mashup of qualities that I really enjoy in other bands and singer / songwriters (Postal Service, Sufjan, Fleet Foxes). You can download their current album on Amazon (11.99 as a CD), Weathervanes, for six freakin' bucks. Seriously, this is worth far more than 1.5 units of whatever expensive coffee crap you're buying today. You can check my review on Amazon

by clicking here. I honestly cannot stop listening to them.

Books

The Other Wes Moore

Amazingly, the day I finished reading this book, I heard an

interview with the author on NPR. This is a crazy (true) story about two guys named Wes Moore. One of them ends up behind bars for life, the other becomes a Rhodes Scholar. Even more amazing, they pretty much grew up in the the same socioeconomic strata... even starting out in the same neighborhood in Baltimore.

This book is incredible - Wes Moore (the author) writes with such clarity and does nothing to sensationalize the type of environment he and the other Wes Moore grew up in. I think it's easy for most of us to be insulated to the travails that many folks in a poorer America go through. We are often baffled as to why anyone would be attracted to the drug life and make it out to be a matter of a life hopeful of ill-conceived gains (think Freakonomics). Wes Moore makes a case that it's a lot more about finding something, or some people, to belong to. You can read my Amazon review by clicking here (you might have to search for my name - CTRL+F and type my name; for Macs, Command+F and type my name).

Street Shadows

This is another Memoir about a kid who essentially escapes the drug life within the ghettos of

Chicago to eventually become an English professor. I don't know why I've been so into these types of narratives lately, but they're really affecting me. This is also a good read. If you were going to read one of the last two books mentioned, I'd pick up The Other Wes Moore, but this is still definitely worth reading.

I think this books gives light to the sort of hurdles some folks have to jump to get out of the cycle of poverty. The writer of this book grew up in a much different way than Wes Moore, however. Both of his parents were with him throughout his life. I think both may have had masters degrees - but the writer still got caught up in some of the drug culture.

Again, pick this book up. You can read my review by clicking here.

Bourbon

This is a fun book full of recipes and history about... Bourbon. I think that there is definitely some content in this book that you wouldn't necessarily find on the net (say, by looking for recipes). But if you don't drink... or aren't interested in making mixed drinks with Bourbon... then don't pick this up. You can read my review here.

So...the experiment was a FAIL.

The only thing I think I am even remotely close to being on target for the grand experiment is (maybe) running (be the averages) and perhaps reading books.

So, this is just a placeholder before I start blogging more... shortly.

Ugh

Laura blogged tonight.

I did not.

Now she's making me go to bed. G'night.

Uncle John

Growing up, I think all my dad's male family members (who were older than him) had been in the military at one time or another. My memory is somewhat sparse so it plays out probably more as a caricature of who they were than as they existed.

There was an Uncle Joe (my dad's uncle) who fought in the Korean War. He rolled his own cigarettes. I vaguely remembering him saying that there were so many Chinese that they fought against in that war that bodies would pile up to the point that they would actually have to readjust their machine guns to shoot over the bodies that were there. He also said something along the lines that the North Koreans and Chinese would actually send people into battle without weapons and that when the people who did have weapons would fall in battle, those without would just pick up where they dropped off (meaning that there were some Chinese and N Koreans with weapons). Uncle Joe is dead - I remember how angry my dad was in how they buried him (his words - in a small pine box).

Uncle Bobby was older (my dad's brother-in-law) but I'm not sure that he actually served. I'm not sure that he didn't either. He still lives in Atlanta and I should probably call him about this. Uncle Bobby doesn't smoke.

There was an uncle Johnny - uncle Johnny only had one eye. As a small child (like under 5) he was very scary. There's not much I remember about him except that I think he rolled his own cigarettes too. He was also one of my dad's uncles. He was a Shannon (my granny's maiden name), as was uncle Joe.

This post, however, is not really about any of them. This is about John Wayne. I used to think that John Wayne was a distant relative of

ours, or a really good friend of my dad's. Part of this might be due to the fact that if the television was on (especially during the weekend and even more so after we got basic cable) we were watching a western.

My daddy's favorite westerns seemed to star John Wayne.

To me, he kind of resembled my dad (which might be another reason for the association). To some degree, I believed that all men knew how to handle a gun, had a southern / western accent, used brill cream and served in the military or was a cowboy (or both). The distance between then and now is great. I know how to handle a gun, but that's where the similarities end. Most people tell me that I don't really have an accent (being their words and not mine, I wonder if most of them think that my accent is in fact nondescript or if there is a geography that it might belong to). I don't use brill cream, but I do sometimes use pomade, wax or gel. I was never in the military. I own a cowboy hat and I've worked in a couple of fields but I've never roped a calf (though... I've known a people who have worked some rodeos).

The distance doesn't end there though. There's the realization that maybe manhood wasn't about that - but that whatever it is, I still don't measure up (and don't know a lot of people who might). There's the reality that all my dad's uncles, my dad... and John Wayne... are all dead. There's the reality that everything uncle John (Wayne) did was an act.

He did it to make money.

He did it to make movies.

He did it to make believe.

Strange that even when looking at an image of a somewhat type-cast multi-personalitied western idol... I still think of lazy summer afternoons in Alabama. I think of sweet tea in mason jars that would sweat just as much as we did, but taste and feel like a little bit of heaven on earth. I think of falling asleep in a t-shirt and a my tighty whiteys while my back was against my daddy's (he would normally wear the same thing). I remember afternoons that never seemed to end as they were inundated with black and white pixels intermixed with commercials for local tire stores and national brands. I remember humidity so thick that it was hard to breath and afternoons that were so hot that we all thought we would combust. I think of my dads menthol flavored Benson & Hedges and how their smoke would waft around the room - how it went in through his mouth, found its way through his lungs and then back out from where it came.

Honestly... this makes me want to rent a few westerns to fall asleep to.

What we do when we get bored...

Laura and I started playing around last night (this probably isn't going where you think it's going) and found these weird animated screens in the Photo Booth on Snow Leopard.

So we played - and here's a little something we came up with.

Roller Coastin' in the Living Room from Gene Twilley on Vimeo.

Leggo my LEGO's

When I was younger, I loved playing with LEGO's. And when I say loved, I mean that there wasn't much else I would play with.

Times were kind of strange for us, I guess. You see... I never had a Nintendo. I never had a Sega Genesis. I never had a Commodore 64. However, I had an Atari 2600. I also had buckets of LEGO's. Stranger - I was never allowed to have GI Joe's (not until I was older than 10 I think). A lot of this is discussion for another time, but for now we'll focus on the LEGO's.

I used to build, disassemble and then build again. There was nothing like opening a brand new box, following the directions to a T and then deciding the fate of various parts on my own. For me, most of what I built revolved around space ships and futuristic vehicles (I was also enamoured with Star Wars). I always enjoyed showing my dad what I had "invented."

I guess it's that whole idea of creating something that tends to get us going - right?

In any case, here are several sites where people have taken LEGO sculpting into an entirely different (by different, I mean stratospheric) level:

This is a sculpture by Nathan Sawaya - out of the three that I'm linking to tonight, I probably liked

his stuff the best. Everything on Nathan's site is so creative and detailed - I definitely think that it's worth your time to check it out. You can see more of his work by clicking here.

Another LEGO artist was Henry Lim. The interesting sculpture he had was of a massive Stegosaurus (or...LEGOsaurus - har har). You can view his site by clicking here.

Lastly, there's Eric Harbarger - I'm more amazed by the sheer amount of work he's done with LEGO's. Visit his site by clicking here.

So... don't get me wrong - this isn't an all-inclusive list - but it's something of a start. I know that there's a lot more out there - but this is what I could find tonight. Enjoy!

iPad

Apple unveiled the iPad today - but it looks likes someone beat them to it three years ago. Check it out.

PHL@Night

Laura and I drove to the Schuylkill near the Art Museum so that we could walk the dog tonight. I did a little running while we were there.

On the way back, I took a few pics with our cheap (it was literally given to me for free 3 or 4 years ago) HP Digital camera.

We always like that the pics and movies from this camera always come out a little grainy - you can even see it in the blurriness of a lot of what I'll be posting. Altogether, picture taking while driving at night is more of an exercise in drawing with light than it is in composition or perspective. I hope you enjoy them at least half as much as I did taking them while waving a camera around (if you do, you can check out more by clicking here)...

Amazing things you can find in and around Philadelphia, PA

I was looking up a local grocery store and found the first link that you'll see tonight. Frankly, I am quite dumbfounded by the website (you'll have to click through to see what I mean). Sometimes, people try really hard to capitalize on something that just doesn't make any sense - this is one of those times.

Click here to check out the website for African Sunshine.

You might think, judging by the quality and lack of intuitiveness of the website, that I made this up. You, my friend, would be entirely mistaken. It's the real deal.

This next one is something that people around here go crazy over - something that I never knew existed before I moved here. On my first day in the office, I had a few of these babies on my desk. Welcome to Philly. Click here to check out the City of Brotherly love's affront to Little Debbie. In all seriousness, I've actually seen Tastykake as a sponsor of local running events. No Joke.

Crown Fried Chicken is something that I've had only once before. The reason: They are ubiquitous in this city. I've probably seen more Crown Fried Chickens here than all fast food burger joints combined. You can read about it here. Or, you can check out how another person will make you your own Crown Fried Chicken website by clicking here.

More samples please...

Looks like Amazon.com (with little surprise) is much like the Sams Club of books - doling out free samples so that you might buy more.

Check it out by clicking here.

I know this sounds gross, and is a total tangent, but I used to love microwavable Chicken Cordon Bleu from Sam's. I think... when I was a teenager... that it meant I was more refined.

Really, I was (am) just fat.

Book Review.

I have opinions. This is one I posted on Amazon tonight.

Street Shadows (book)

I friends.

Jason and Haley are awesome.

Nice.

nice. http://www.johnwayne.com/

Because I travel a lot...

If you know me (on a personal level) then you know that for the past couple of years I've traveled a lot for work. In fact, I think I spent over 70 nights in hotels in 2009. That is nearly 1/3 of my regular business days when you factor in vacation time and holidays.

Seriously.

So, when I travel for work, I generally try to abide by a few rules to make things more fun for myself.

1. Pack light. And by light, I mean try to fit a weeks worth of clothes (to include a few casual changes and workout wear) in one bag.
2. Take the train. There's only one place to book a train too - Amtrak. This makes things simultaneously easy and frustrating. However, the train is cheaper 90% of the time, it goes to most places I need to travel, it is (by far) cleaner than driving, there is always a bathroom and it is faster than driving 95% of the time. Yes, both percentages are fairly arbitrary guesses.
3. I wear out googlemaps. There is little better in trying to find a place to eat than searching, "Restaurant near X," when X equals my location. I use this even though I bring along my GPS.
4. Eat local. I break this rule from time to time, but I generally stay away from hotel food and chains. Generally. It keeps locals in business and lets me try something that I may have never had before. I can always eat at a Chili's, TGIF, Cheescake Factory, etc (and be summarily disappointed that I didn't try something different) at home - I can't eat at City Steam Brewery unless I'm in Hartford.
5. If I don't know what's best, use UrbanSpoon. I like this site better than most other review sites because you have two choices (stars are so subjective and reviews are all over the board) and only two choices... you either like it or you don't.
6. Bring a good book (you can check out some of the books I've read and reviewed on Amazon by clicking here). This is one of the things that keeps me a little sane when I'm eating alone. I don't like to sit at a bar and I (generally) don't like to talk to my waiter / waitress - unless they have something good to tell me about the menu.
7. Cash. You wouldn't believe how many places don't take credit cards. Just a thought - but I often wonder if these same places claim my cash meals on their taxes...
8. Extra Underwear. I'm just sayin'.
9. Your own [drinking] cups. If you don't know why, then you're one of the few people I know who haven't watched this. There's usually a simple trick to find out if your glasses are being replaced (and they should be replaced - a maid shouldn't be washing out glasses in the bathroom or with glass cleaner). Many times, there is a sticker on the bottom of the glass - write your initials on the glass and fill it with tea or something else - leave it at least half full. When you come back the next day, check the glasses to see if any of them bear your initial. On a strange side note... I've also marked glasses with a permanent marker because it was all I had. By the way, if this (see the video) happens to you - tell the front desk.

There are other things to take into consideration depending on my mode of transport. These are the foundations of what I do when traveling for business though.

Earth: Destroyed

You can read about a Near Earth Object (scheduled for 2029) at Wired by clicking here. I could be wrong, but I think that the Russian space agency is trying to convince the world that this one has a better chance of hitting the earth than NASA thinks and that we should be doing everything in our power now to prevent a collision in the future. You can actually read that story by clicking here.

And these are pretty crazy numbers - they're saying a 1-in-37 chance! NASA scoffs and says, "No, it's more like 1-in-250,000." Either way, the odds are better than dying via tsunami or fireworks discharge (see here). The odds are absurdly better than winning the lottery (see here).

But what if it wasn't an outside force that destroyed the earth?

What if what destroyed earth, as we know it, was earth itself?

Did you know that Yellowstone is one of at least seven super volcanoes around the world (see here). If she blows - it doesn't matter where you are, it will be cataclysmic.

What about a reversal of the magnetic fields? It can happen and some scientists say that it is happening. Many scientist, such as those who practice science on the Discovery Channel, say that this won't be a harmful event. This guy thinks that it could start a new ice age. He further states that the fact that winter is cold might be proof that we're moving into that new ice age!

What do you think? Does any of this really matter (as obviously, it matters a lot more to some people than it apparently does to me)? Why would it matter?

The experiment is not a bust...

I'm just spending a birthday / anniversary weekend with my wife and where we are is a place that literally doesn't have very many three-pronged outlets. So...the experiment is still on, but since I never made a resolution I don't feel guilty about not blogging earlier (I've found a three pronged outlet - which is how I am currently blogging).

Five years and one day married.
Twenty-nine years living.

So - Happy Annibirthary to me!

We walked through two small towns today and I did my short run. Also, I finished reading the book I mentioned earlier this week (review to appear within seven days - mark my words).

I received a birthday shout out from my mom and my parents-in-law too.

All's well.

Where spam gets reeeeal big...

My favorite line is the "Viking's Secret."

Why would anyone buy any of this crap (and you know...someone has to be buying it, otherwise you and I wouldn't get these spam messages).
There's a lot there about unfulfilled promises and a twisted picture of what a man (or manhood) should be. But...tonight I'm too tire to talk about it.

Instead, you get a picture of my spam folder.

When I Used to Write

When I was in the sixth grade, I fell in love with writing.

Unfortunately, that love affair (as a compulsive and ever-present desire) only lasted through my sophomore year of college. Every now and again, there would be glimpses of that love again - but nothing as it was before. Now, most of my writing tends to be somewhat "journalistic" as opposed to "creative," or "poetic." Most of what I write now has been condensed to one line (or one sentence...or one run-on sentence) about what my current "status," is. Or, more tritely, a one line zinger about your status.

But...I want to fall in love again.

What got me interested [in writing] in the first place was the fact that a teacher in a class I had (it was called ACE - but I never knew what it stood for; when I lived in Huntsville, it was called SPACE) really encouraged me to write. He encourage our whole class to write.

And to think.
And to dream.

It was one of the first times that I felt like the things that I could produce had the potential to be special - even if it was only to me. We produced a literary journal to sell to our other middle-schooled classmates.

As you might imagine, these were pretty hot commodities.

But, as I've already stated, what made this so much of a formative thing for me was the fact that my life was no longer ruled so much by what I could learn or experience by means of math and science nor was life so much about what I could gather from reading another's prose or poetry. Life meant that I could create with words (as opposed to LEGO's, or tinker toys, or plastic model pieces with plastic cement) and that I could manifest a world that was simultaneously other and familiar.

His name was Mr. Craft (I think his first name may have been "Bart," or "Barthlomew"...). He is one of teachers in my life who has really stood out - someone who helped me to sort of shake the snow globe that is my life and realize that there isn't just another side to the globe, but that there's a world outside of it too.

So if you've kept up - part of this experiment is as much about remembering who I once was as it is about telling you about who I am and who I want to be.

Recent Amazon Reviews (Jan 5, 2010)

I felt like it was the best thing (but not the compulsive thing) to list a date as it seems I've used a very similar title before.

Sometimes...I review stuff on Amazon just because I can. I can be strange in that way. I'll have you know, however, that I never review something that I don't own. Thanks to Amazon for giving me a place where I can let my undoubtedly helpful reviews be known to the world.

So, to take a breather for the evening (because I'm admittedly already exhausted by this Obsessive experiment) - here are a few things that I've reviewed recently and one thing that isn't recent, but seems to have a somewhat legendary status (out of three hundred reviews, it's one of the three spotlighted on the product...)

A Forizzle Frying Force
(Cuisinart Chef's Classic Fry Pan) My review of a frying pan.

Read it for the Subplots
(Her Fearful Symmetry - Audrey Niffenegger) A nice book I read "recent"...

They Are Spoons
(Oxo Good Grips Soft 6-Piece Measuring Spoon Set, Black) They are measuring spoons...and they apparently make some people (who are not me) very angry...because those people don't know how to wash dishes very well.

For the Happiness it Brings
(Panasonic ER421KC Nose and Ear Hair Trimmer, Wet/Dry, Lighted) One of the best investments I ever made. The ladies love a clean inner nose...

Uncertain, scared and mentally blocked...

One of the things I worry about in this fantastic experiment (mentioned in yesterday's post) is the fact that, at some point, there has to be a form of creative exhaustion. There will only be so many times that I can write about washing my hands before things become truly OCD on my part.

In any case, I've made a hard stop to read a book that I received from Amazon while I was out of the office - Street Shadows: a Memoir of Race, Rebellion, and Redemption.

Already, the book is sounding like a repeat of the Night of the Gun (David Carr's own memoir - you can find my review of that book by clicking here and searching [ctrl+f] for my name), which would not be such a bad thing as it is much shorter.

I picked the book because I thought that it might help me to understand some of the culture that I currently live in.

We'll see how that works out.

In the mean time, I'll think of something witty (or not so) to say. One of the things I've been thinking about lately refers to a comment I overheard at a recent holiday party. Essentially, this person asserted that the Bible couldn't be trusted because the people who wrote it were doing so with an agenda. I can agree to that - postmodern criticism would push us to the understanding that no one writes, thinks, speaks, etc. without an internal or underlying bias. But, the argument of what that agenda means and the implications of that agenda is something that's been on my mind a lot today.

Plus...that one's a lot easier than the other points brought up - inequality as practiced by the church, hoarding of wealth, denial of guilt / wrongdoing, etc.

I only mention it without writing about it because I'd like to handle it in a somewhat scholarly manner - you know...with footnotes and stuff.

So...is anyone still reading [this] blog anymore?

By the way...I head that agenda was to [in the future] sell vacuums and anything else that would look nicer with Jesus posted all over it (dental services, medical services, real estate, restaurants, etc.).

The grand experiment...

I've decided that this would be the year that I would take on some of the traits of an obsessive compulsive without the detriment of having an undesirable and otherwise inexplicable compulsiveness.

So really...I'll just become obsessive with things. This, however, is probably a bit of an underlying trait I carry anyways.

Though many of these will seem like resolutions, they aren't - I'm not promising anything and I'm not necessarily trying th change anything about myself (as I believe resolutions are usually meant for). Also, I think that the general non-commitment of a non-resolution will ultimately aid me by not causing me to feel guilty about something else I haven't done and why I haven't done it.

Right.

So, here are a list of things that I'll experiment in being obsessive with over the next few or twelve months and we'll see how it pans out. BTW: If you notice me washing my hands to the point of bleeding or checking the locks four or five times before I leave the house, please help me.

1. I'd like to blog everyday. This could be anything. It could be a picture or a blurb. I'd like to do it just for the fun of seeing how things turn out over the course of the year. I'm also hoping that this gets me into taking more pictures - which is something I used to love to do.

2. I'd like to run a mile a day. Big whoop, right? Again - something I used to love to do but just haven't been in to since I have such a long commute. A mile isn't a huge commitment though - something I could do in a short amount of time before I leave for work in the mornings (and even on the road). I really wouldn't mind setting a goal of 1,000 miles this year (I didn't run yesterday, btw, but I'm fairly certain that I walked over a mile).

3. I'd like to spend an entire month posting pictures. Look for it. I live in a beautiful city with unique scens I'd like to share with you and the rest of the world. Did I ever tell you that I took a photography class in college? Well, I just did.

4. I would like to read 26 books. Easy - if there's a book I'm in to, I can usually read through in a day or two. I more than likely read more than this in 2009 but just didn't keep track. I'm reading Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim by David Sedaris right now. Utter hilarity.

5. Have someone to our house for dinner once a month. That is...someone I don't know very well. There are a lot of people I'd like to know better. That's only twelve meals.

6. Begin martial arts training. Sike.

I think that this will keep me busy while still leaving me time to do that thing I do to pay the bills.

Also...I think it will be fun. You know...if I don't become OCD...

New Year...

It is 2:33AM.

I am baking bread.

It is the new year.

The night is more still than what I'm used to. Probably because it is now 2:34AM.

There is an occasional car that drives down one of the main streets. For some reason...none of the mufflers here seem to work too well.

At midnight, there were fireworks. I was mixing dough.

It is in the stillness that I can hear the clock ticking. My heart is beating. There is a low hum coming from the fan that Laura turns on to produce white noise when we're asleep.

And still...an occasional car.

Have I ever talked to you about my idea of the relative nature of time? I've talked to Laura a lot about it. This minute now is the fastest minute I've ever experienced, but it's not the fastest minute I'll ever experience within the breadth of all of time.

More importantly... does the shortness of this minute matter any more or less than the span of the minutes preceding or following this point in time?

In terms of time...no.

In terms of substance? Maybe.

I look at our Christmas tree. It's been up for nearly a month. This is something I've thought about for a while now, but just haven't found the time to write it out (until I decided to finish making bread at 2:43AM). That is, this Christmas tree is carrying the weight of sadness from the past. There are relics and ghosts who call out only to find themselves locked behind glass or lamps or plastic or yarn. They show the burden of years and bear memories whose depths are more than may be measured.

2010. Bread.